Our Fearless MTV Movie Awards Predictions

This Sunday, the 2012 MTV Movie Awards hit our screens live at 9 p.m. EST, hosted by two time VMA vet Russell Brand. In the ’90s and most of the 2000s, the MTV Movie Awards were my favorite awards ceremony — they just seemed so cool. Nowadays, though I’m less enthralled with the reality TV-heavy programming that dominates MTV during the day, I still always make sure to watch the Movie Awards, waiting for that Best Kiss moment or the chance to root for my actual favorites over the snobbery that often takes home Oscars (no, guys, I never will forgive “The King’s Speech,” sorry).

But over the past several years, something unsavory has occurred. The “Twilight” films happened. I’m generally a “Twilight” defender, insisting that as badly written as the books are (of course I’ve read them) and as terrible a female role model as Bella is, Kevin Smith is right when he says the books are breeding a new generation of fangirls, and “Twilight” is merely the gateway drug. Still, the “Twilight” juggernaut has made the MTV Movie Awards slightly less fun to watch in recent years, as it’s the same people accepting awards over and over, most of “the same people” being Kristen Stewart, who should really never be speaking in public in the first place.

But this year could be different. This year has not only the final installment of “Harry Potter” pitted against “Breaking Dawn – Part 1,” but it has “The Hunger Games,” the anti-”Twilight” franchise that Twi-hards still love! Could it be possible that something will finally dethrone the Cullens? Here are our fearless predictions.

BEST ON-SCREEN DIRTBAG

Bryce Dallas Howard – “The Help”
Jon Hamm – “Bridesmaids”
Jennifer Aniston – Horrible Bosses”
Colin Farrell – “Horrible Bosses”
Oliver Cooper – “Project X”

Should Win: Bryce Dallas Howard. Truly despicable. It’s hard to argue for anyone else when Hilly Holbrook is nominated.

Will Win: This is the strangest bunch of nominations I’ve seen for any category in any awards show, well, ever — partly because this category used to be called Best Villain, but switching to Best Dirt Bag inspires an entirely different pattern of thought. I’m gonna predict Oliver Cooper from “Project X,” ’cause I think the MTV Crowd may be the only folks who saw “Project X,” and considering the movie did pretty well at the box office, that’s gotta count for something. Otherwise, I’d go with Jennifer Aniston for being a very recognizable name in a very strange category.

BEST CAST

Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph, Rose Byrne, Melissa McCarthy, Wendi McLendon-Covey and Ellie Kemper – “Bridesmaids”
Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint and Tom Felton – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2″
Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Elizabeth Banks, Woody Harrelson and Lenny Kravitz – “The Hunger Games”
Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, Ice Cube, Dave Franco, Ellie Kemper and Brie Larson – “21 Jump Street”
Emma Stone, Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer, Bryce Dallas Howard and Jessica Chastain – “The Help”

Should Win: “Bridesmaids.” “Bridesmaids” should have won SAG, too. I’ll like to see anyone in this crowd out-funny those gals with as much heart and authenticity.

Will Win: “The Hunger Games,” unless I really just don’t understand teenagers anymore, which is totally possible considering I haven’t been one in seven years. Although this type of category has a history of going to hardcore action films or comedies, 2012 marks the first time a category like this (formally Best On-Screen Duo) has appeared at the awards since 2006, and a lot has changed in terms of voting demographic since then.

BEST FIGHT

Daniel Radcliffe vs. Ralph Fiennes – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2″
Jennifer Lawrence and Josh Hutcherson vs. “Alexander Ludwig – “The Hunger Games”
Tom Cruise vs. Michael Nyqvist – “Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol”
Channing Tatum and Jonah Hill vs. the Kid Gang – “21 Jump Street”
Joel Edgerton vs. Tom Hardy – “Warrior”

Should Win: “Harry Potter.” I’m tempted to say “Warrior,” but that sequence is more brilliant as a climax than simply a fight. Harry vs. Voldemort is epic and deserves all of the awards, especially after the film was so brutally shut out of the Oscars.

Will Win: “Harry Potter.” Don’t be annoying, kids. I’m counting on you here.

BEST KISS

Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams – “The Vow”
Jennifer Lawrence and Josh Hutcherson – “The Hunger Games”
Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart – “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1″
Emma Watson and Rupert Grint – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2″
Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone – “Crazy, Stupid, Love.”

Should Win: Emma Watson and Rupert Grint. Granted, their actual kiss was terrible, but still, it’s RON AND HERMIONE FINALLY KISSING!!! Plus, it’s now tradition for the winners to kiss once they are on stage, which means we might actually get the kiss we were hoping for all along instead of that can’t-see-their-actual-lips-touching crap from the movie.

Will Win: Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. They have won three years in a row. I’m not a betting woman.

BEST GUT-WRENCHING PERFORMANCE

Kristen Wiig, Maya Rudolph, Rose Byrne, Melissa McCarthy, Wendi McLendon-Covey and Ellie Kemper – “Bridesmaids”
Bryce Dallas Howard – “The Help”
Jonah Hill and Rob Riggle – “21 Jump Street”
Ryan Gosling – “Drive”
Tom Cruise – “Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol”

Should Win: “Bridesmaids” (though I’m tempted to say “Drive”)

Will Win: “Bridesmaids.” Right? How can it not?

BEST ON-SCREEN TRANSFORMATION

Elizabeth Banks – “The Hunger Games”
Rooney Mara – “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”
Johnny Depp – “21 Jump Street”
Michelle Williams – “My Week with Marilyn”
Colin Farrell – “Horrible Bosses”

Should Win: Rooney Mara. That girl literally mutilated herself for this role. Well, if getting pierced counts as mutilation. Which, for the purposes of this article, it does.

Will Win: Johnny Depp. I don’t know, doesn’t he win everything? And truth be told, I had no idea that was him until the reveal, so I couldn’t really argue with it.

BEST MUSIC

“Party Rock Anthem” – LMFAO (“21 Jump Street”)
“A Real Hero” – College with Electric Youth (“Drive”)
“The Devil Is in the Details” – The Chemical Brothers (“Hanna”)
“IMpossible” – Figurine (“Like Crazy”)
“Pursuit of Happiness” – Kid Cudi (Steve Aoki remix) (“Project X”)

Should Win: “Hanna” Hanna Hanna Hanna Hanna always and forever. Otherwise, “Drive.”

Will Win: “21 Jump Street.” To be honest, I have no idea, but the youngsters seem to like LMFAO, I doubt their parents let many of them see “Drive,” and 20 bucks says they haven’t even heard of the wonderful “Hanna.” Seeing as how this category has only popped up once in the past 12 years, it’s hard to know what to expect.

BEST COMEDIC PERFORMANCE

Jonah Hill – “21 Jump Street”
Kristen Wiig – “Bridesmaids”
Melissa McCarthy – “Bridesmaids”
Oliver Cooper – “Project X”
Zach Galifianakis – “The Hangover Part II”

Should Win: Melissa McCarthy.

Will Win: Melissa McCarthy. If not, something is very very wrong.

BREAKTHROUGH PERFORMANCE

Elle Fanning – “Super 8″
Melissa McCarthy – “Bridesmaids”
Rooney Mara – “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”
Liam Hemsworth – “The Hunger Games”
Shailene Woodley – “The Descendants”

Should Win: Melissa McCarthy.

Will Win: Melissa McCarthy. Comedic performances have a history of winning here, at least in this decade, and I can’t imagine voters have really even seen many of the movies on this list outside of “Hunger Games.”

BEST FEMALE PERFORMANCE

Jennifer Lawrence – “The Hunger Games”
Rooney Mara – “The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo”
Emma Stone – “Crazy, Stupid, Love.”
Emma Watson – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2″
Kristen Wiig – “Bridesmaids”

Should Win: Rooney Mara.

Will Win: KRISTEN STEWART ISN’T NOMINATED! Jennifer Lawrence.

BEST MALE PERFORMANCE

Joseph Gordon-Levitt – “50/50″
Ryan Gosling – “Drive”
Josh Hutcherson – “The Hunger Games”
Daniel Radcliffe – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2″
Channing Tatum – “The Vow”

Should Win: Ryan Gosling.

Will Win: ROBERT PATTINSON ISN’T NOMINATED!! Josh Hutcherson.

MOVIE OF THE YEAR

“Bridesmaids”
“The Hunger Games”
“Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part 2″
“The Help”
“The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1″

Should Win: “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows – Part 2.” Epic conclusion to one of the most wonderful and beloved franchises of all time.

Will Win: A “Twilight” film has won every year it has been nominated. But you know what? I’m gonna get crazy. Everyone’s a little bit older now, and a little bit more into “Hunger Games” and a little bit more into not sucking at life. So I’m gonna say it. “Hunger Games.”